27th Jul 201400:51415,909 notes

myramylove:

I don’t think I can do any of these.

(via pizza)

tiredboyclub:

the nodding then the wink 
10th Jul 201423:39369,123 notes
10th Jul 201422:0811,161 notes
24th Jun 201401:434,323 notes

dickflavouredsoup:

her eyes were the colour of

image

(via pizza)

rnessage:

be nice to people because the world is a shitty place and we all need a little help sometimes

(via pizza)

wlse:

my dogs gave me a lecture today

(via pizza)

beben-eleben:

A Fire Pit IN THE POOL

image

A Door That Turns into a Ping-Pong Table

image

Chilled Produce Drawers in the Kitchen

image

A Wine Cellar Trap Door

image

 A Sleepover Room

image

A Door Handle That Automatically Turns Off Electricity and Gas When You Leave

image

A Swing-Set Dining Table

image

A Built-In TV for the Bathtub

image

A Glass-Encased Fireplace

image

 A Loft Hammock

image

A Hot Tub That Flows from the Inside to Outside

image

A Huge Round Bedroom Window

image

A Stained-Glass Door

image

A Library Staircase/Slide

image

A Bone-Shaped Pool for Your Dog

image

(via best-of-text-posts)

lookingforandromeda:

feministsupernatural:

royaltyfashion:

royalwatcher:

this picture is killing me

Everybody trying to help The Queen and then there’s Puttin

Putin doesn’t even try not to look like the villain from a James Bond movie.

Putin knows he’s evil
12th Jun 201411:13123,742 notes
roadtothealter:

Alessandra Ambrosio Harpers Bazaar Arabia
12th Jun 201411:12262 notes
10th Jun 201401:58190,334 notes
sk-raveness:

drucila616:

How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces?These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?WITNESS: My name is Susan!_______________________________ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?WITNESS: No, I just lie there.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?WITNESS: July 18th.ATTORNEY: What year?WITNESS: Every year._____________________________________ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?WITNESS: Forty-five years._________________________________ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?WITNESS: I forget..ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?____________________________________ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?WITNESS: He’s 20, much like your IQ.___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?WITNESS: Are you shitting me?_________________________________________ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?WITNESS: Getting laid____________________________________________ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: How many were boys?WITNESS: None.ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?____________________________________________ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?WITNESS: By death..ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?WITNESS: Take a guess.___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beardATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male._____________________________________ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.______________________________________ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight._________________________________________ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?WITNESS: Oral…_________________________________________ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PMATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?______________________________________And last:ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?WITNESS: No..ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Reblogging because there are some sassy little shits out there.
9th Jun 201421:53773,332 notes
9th Jun 201418:4060,480 notes
humansofnewyork:

"We’re eye doctors.""What’s something about the eye that most people don’t realize?""The eye doesn’t see. The brain sees. The eye just transmits. So what we see isn’t only determined by what comes through the eyes. What we see is affected by our memories, our feelings, and by what we’ve seen before."
9th Jun 201418:3747,321 notes
Opaque  by  andbamnan